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My biggest flaw

My biggest flaw: the application of what I've learned and who I want to be into my day to day life. That is the difference between understanding and groking. Why do I struggle with that final step? What can I do to make it easier?

People tell me that I just have to do it and it gets easier over time. Play that role that you want to play and soon you'll get more comfortable being that person. These steps feel too big for me, though. It's like learning to juggle. You don't just start throwing three balls around. The first step is getting comfortable with that single ball before you add the second and third.
But I keep on trying to throw all three balls in the air and just end up dropping everything and embarrassing myself.

Comments

( 25 comments — Leave a comment )
tyrven
Feb. 17th, 2005 03:15 am (UTC)
What's wrong with who you are now?!?
patrick
Feb. 17th, 2005 03:50 am (UTC)
I'm a passive fellow who often finds himself being a little on the timid side. I would like to make myself have more confidence in who I am and what I want because, gosh darn it, I deserve better!
langston
Feb. 17th, 2005 03:18 am (UTC)
Less juggling. More Poker. My House. 9pm.
jizosh
Feb. 17th, 2005 03:19 am (UTC)
What he said.
patrick
Feb. 17th, 2005 04:00 am (UTC)
you should get in on our poker game sometime, josh.

don't you have a reoccuring night for the poker?
erik
Feb. 17th, 2005 06:09 am (UTC)
Pat, we're playing poker this Friday night, btw, if you're interested. $10 buy-in. Pot should be around $90.
jizosh
Feb. 17th, 2005 07:21 am (UTC)
Yeah, we have a Friday night home game, but I also play a couple more weekly games. We're always looking for new players if you or anyone else is interested, or maybe we could go into a two or three table tourny. Lemme know.
patrick
Feb. 17th, 2005 03:59 am (UTC)
yes yes, i'll be there
nder
Feb. 17th, 2005 03:31 am (UTC)
babysteps are of the success makings!
play with your balls more, one at a time, if needed.
patrick
Feb. 17th, 2005 04:12 am (UTC)
playing with my balls is so much fun!
nder
Feb. 17th, 2005 04:19 am (UTC)
yaaa triple entendres!
can be useful too, growings wise and all.
chopolonaise
Feb. 17th, 2005 03:32 am (UTC)
talk to yourself! it helped me.





and it also made me crazier.
patrick
Feb. 17th, 2005 04:16 am (UTC)
Vice Magazine suggests talking to yourself too. They suggest repeating what you want over and over and basically completely focusing on that one thing. Once you commit yourself completely to it, you are more likely to succeed.
erik
Feb. 17th, 2005 06:08 am (UTC)
Talk to yourself over and over, repeating the same thing? I see these people doing that on the street, Pat, and I always assume they're fucking crazy. I'm not sure repetition to the point of insanity is the right tactic. :-)
patrick
Feb. 17th, 2005 08:05 am (UTC)
Well, I'm not talking about being some psycho and freaking people out, but I think it's sort of like mentally hyping yourself up.
xkissikx
Feb. 17th, 2005 03:33 am (UTC)
i personally like who you are, but i understand what you mean. when i have felt like this i try to think of specific activities that would utilize certain things i have learned. it has worked for me in the past, at least to help me feel like i am applying some of what i have learned.
patrick
Feb. 17th, 2005 04:11 am (UTC)
Good advice. I'm trying to figure out how to break these things down more. It would help me lots if I could.

I push myself a lot in social situations. Try and talk to new people and make new friends. Try and keep up in conversations. That's hard.
chopolonaise
Feb. 17th, 2005 03:34 am (UTC)
also, changing environments forces you to naturally adapt and you can learn there and then come back and it might be more comfortable to be who you want to be whatever that may be i like you now. there aren't enough people like you. everyone else just has their heads up their asses. (like one of my recent cartoons that no one understands but i like them anyways so i post them because I'M CRAZY!!)
patrick
Feb. 17th, 2005 04:09 am (UTC)
I love your cartoons, they are awesome!! I'm a little biased.

I agree that changing enviroments can help. I tried to make that happen with the new house, but it's not really enough. I have my doubts that even moving to a new city would be enough, although it would help.

Have I ever told you that I want to move to Austin, Texas?
chopolonaise
Feb. 18th, 2005 02:53 am (UTC)
no! tell me about austin!
patrick
Feb. 26th, 2005 10:49 am (UTC)
It is a magical land where fairies grow and it's ruled by the Raven King. Do not trust the fairies, for they are with evil intent! It's also kinda like Seattle, except the weather is totally different! And the music scene is a little more country.
endquote
Feb. 17th, 2005 03:46 am (UTC)
You've learned stuff and know who you want to be? Dude, you're certainly ahead of me on that one.
patrick
Feb. 17th, 2005 04:07 am (UTC)
i r smrt!!@!
roark
Feb. 17th, 2005 03:55 am (UTC)
I think I first learned the dynamics of juggling by juggling tissues. Just using one ball won't teach you anything. Bust out the tissues.
patrick
Feb. 17th, 2005 04:06 am (UTC)
it was just an analogy, but i know a thing or two about juggling
Well, personally I've always been more comfortable with the contact juggling over any sort of toss juggling. But tissues are a great way to get comfortable with throwing objects around and catching them again.
( 25 comments — Leave a comment )

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